Why is Cancer of the Heart so exceedingly rare? Is it because it is always in use and never has a chance to atrophy and become diseased (aside from sheer mechanical clogging (infarction/heart attack) or breakdown via congenital defects). Is it the essence of the “Use it or lose it” principle in effect? Is it because of the continuous flow of life that it is engaged in? Is it deemed an “essential service” by the brain and/or other governing bodily systems and simply not allowed to go on strike? Is there an analogy here that can be applied in reverse? Can the strength of the heart be used to combat cancer?
If you listen to Gábór Maté’s ideas of a “cancer personality” you may begin to think so. While he doesn’t come out and say there is a specific personality that “causes” cancer, he does talk about certain personality traits that predispose people to building up stress without dealing with or processing it properly. He also talks about how a “real” human connection (ie: true, “active” listening, etc.) and a fearless look into the murky parts of ourselves are both useful tools in healing. I would go further to say that casting the light of bright heart energy into our dark parts is a very serious healing technique.
I’m not talking about just temporary light-heartedness, which is fine but ultimately not strong enough to truly overcome and shrink the fear. Maté talks about how some of the “happiest” people can die the most quickly from cancer (eg: She was always such a happy person) because they’re not really meeting their stresses and fears head on and dealing with them. Humour is certainly a good medicine but it needs to come from the gut or the heart not the head. Trying to view the dark reality through “rose coloured glasses” can’t be sustained healthily over long periods of time. How long can you laugh your head off, before your sides start to hurt? Laughing like crazy deflects the fear for a while and helps us to look at least briefly at the darkness, but courage is what helps us to stare it down until it shrinks like a water-splashed witch, into a puddle on the floor. A warm glow in your heart that will make you smile for hours is what is needed. I you can’t get a smiley warm glow a determined, angry but controlled burn is also good. I discovered I had and could harness this “grim determination” when facing my own cancer a few years ago. A steadily burning, smouldering handful of courage embers is enough to keep the nagging wolves of fear at bay.
What about making a heart connection with others? Maté tells a telling story from when he was in school:
“I’m being watched through this one-sided mirror by residents and psychiatrists, to evaluate my interviewing skills, and I’m talking to the patient who at some point says something poignant and I touch his knee and say: Tell me more about that. This was the frightening part. [The evaluator said]: Why did you do that? Touching his knee? It was brilliant! You make contact with somebody on a human level, and they think it’s a brilliant technique: Where did you learn this? It’s just something that any human being would naturally do.”
In other words, do what human beings naturally do:
1) Listen more carefully and with your heart. The ear has a direct connection to the heart.
2) Touch each other more often. Don’t be shy to look into each others’ eyes and reach out to touch each others’ hearts once in a while.
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